September 30, 2011


Bila stress, procrastinate - makan, online, makan, petik uke, makan, tengok movie, makan, online
Bila lost, procrastinate - makan, petik uke, makan, online, makan, online, tengok movie
Bila sedih, hibernate - turn off emotion, tidur, melalak, tidur, call bros, tido, turn off emotion, jadi zombie, solat banyak banyak (time macam ni baru la kan nak buat semua benda)
Bila happy, well, be happy - gelak gelak, happy, gelak gelak, makan, tak tidur, jumpa kawan
Bila serabut - tidur, take a shower, tidur, makan, online, borak borak, kemas katil, kemas meja, kemas semua bend yang boleh dikemas, so indirectly procrastinate jugak, tidur, buat entri baru.

Apa nak jadi ni D. Your future is on the line, I need the old you back, please lah 8 bulan je kot lagi!

P/s: I should make a point to do a cover/write an original. Ceh bercita cita tinggi sungguh.

September 28, 2011

Just a quick random thought.

Anon from Melaka, do you still read this?


Teringat sebab tengah baca previous post. Do say Hi! :)

September 27, 2011

Geekier than you.

Just started the new semester and I'm already pulling my hair out. *Ok deep breaths! Final year SHOULD be this hard*
I just, I don't know man. I feel lost in figuring what I'm interested at. I told one lecturer just now (which I think she is the president of super cool lecturers, period.) that I like meddling with codes. LIKE WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING? Yes, I like codes buuuuuut you know I'm super easy to get all messed up because of codings and what not. Maybe that's the problem with me. Whatever that is.

Oh and I think I am attached (somewhat) to my finance class (as always). Haha, I think all finance lecturers are like, have super powers or something because they tend to talk about whatever happens around them AND affects me as well. Mr. R, he worked at certain places, which reminded me of both my past and current person(s), and he was telling the class how you should get out there, make name for yourself and taking chances to fail. I lack in that department - being a failure. I mean, not to say I'm a winner per se-, but to fail is such a huge deal for me because I could not afford it, mentally and financially, y'know?

Sigh, I'm too consumed with school sometimes. Fyp ideas got rejected again, because they're too simple, not third year material.
=(. Have to step up my game. Final year? Bring it on!
One thing for sure, I can see now that everything is Allah's means to get to me. Which, ya Allah I am forever grateful.
And, I miss my cat too. I hope you miss me as much, Po.

September 24, 2011

A tribute to Po, and everything else in between.

Cheesy alert! (But then again, who reads this blog?)
Few months back, I met a cat. An extraordinary one. Err, aku ni penakut kucing, sikit sikit. But, it's different with Po. Dulu aku selalu question how can people actually get attached to cats and treat them as family, now i know why. And she's like a sister I never had. Tak make sense kan kalau nak cakap she understands me? But she does. Really, I'm amazed. Ada this one night, I was telling her that I'll be leaving her soon and that I love her, lepastu tu aku tidur. All the while she licked my hand whenever I said I love her, and that I'm scared of what will come next. (And she's never a licker, always a biter) How can that not be sweet? Sighs.

Cats. Nanti, kalau dah ada rumah sendiri, I'll have one. I and S mesti suka :D
So here I am, back in the Jungle, tempat paling panas dalam Malaysia. Ten months ago, all I can ever think about was to plan out dates with the (now ex) boyfriend, to sort out my transportation problems to and fro the office, and to have fun all the way, as much as I can. Little did I know, things changed drastically. I'm no longer living with the parents, we talked once a month, if not never. Met I and S not on a daily basis (which pains me because I am dependent on them whether I like it or not), - THIS, is a big deal because, unlike some of yous my age, I still care about being under one roof with my flesh and blood, I guess I'm a family person - and well - being single, thats not a shocker, living with family which I'm not that close to but I have to because I got nowhere to go and not enough moolah to rent on my own AND live with their antics. But the toughest part was (still is), living with my emotional breakdowns every once in a while.


BUT. Somehow, I manage to keep myself happy. Maybe all of that is a blessing in disguise. I learn how to give and take, I learn how to appreciate things and people around me, and as cliche as this may sound, I learn how to love myself - baby steps baby steps! Banyk benda yang dulu aku ingat, this is it, this is how my life gonna be, not great but not so bad either... but then BAM! it's like Allah's sending me signs.. like He was telling me "Nope D, there's A LOT more to this, and you can be so much better, wake up!"

Alhamdulillah, I can never thank You enough. Never, not in my lifetime.
It's nice, falling in love with your Creator. All the things that anchoring me down are no longer there, and I feel much much lighter. I feel like,my life has been rebooted and all I have is a piece of a blank canvas and I can paint it whichever way I want it to be.

SubhanAllah. Tuhan je tahu apa aku rasa sekarang.
I hope my final year would be as I wanted it to be. InshaAllah.

September 22, 2011

I fall too easy this time. Cis. Who the hell are you and why are you so fascinating?
Too bad I won't be seeing you anymore. Not in the near future at least.

September 14, 2011

Kawan, Peneman tidur berkala. Pengejut tidur (berkala jugak). Peneman bila sedih. Peneman bila tengah perasan nak jadi kreatif. You will be missed Po. I mean, yeah i can visit but it won't be the same. Macam mana nak go on a day without you nanti once I'm in the Jungle. You're the only one that knows my story, that I can count on, and that won't judge. I love you.
Dan, budak ni macam tau tau je condition aku sekarang.

Thanks sbb bagi aku gelak hahahaha sengal gila. And point taken!
Had a great night with fav. girl. Fav girl, kalau awak terstumble upon my blog one day (and terbaca entry ni), I just want you to know you indirectly there through my worst times. Dari duuuuuulu during your xanga's and livejournal's time, sampai ke myspace, sampai la ni dah jadi mega superstar. I am proud of you. Your songs (and covers) may seem like simple love songs but they're not to me. They are much bigger than that, they triggers pain, sadness, and sometimes made me reflects on things. So thank you.

Lagu baru awak give me hope to hold on. Though saya cakap saya okay, saya rasa saya tak okay sangat. Still healing. Lagu pendek awak buat saya nangis malam tu, just like the night I decided to call things off. Lagu Coffee awak buat saya senyum, sampai sekarang.

Thank you Yunalis Zaraai, I love your work, and you, as a person.
I'mma be so happy that when people sees me they'd be happy too. InshaAllah. I CAN DO THIS!

September 12, 2011


So, I'm 24 no mwehehe feel so.. surreal being one, i guess? And! My birthday came in the form of super awesomeness - Everyone at work were cheering and wishing me every chances they got (...I've never gotten anyone except my family, to remember and be happy for me on my day, so it was something nice :)), some random conversation with a couple of strangers turns into budding friendships (I hope!), and my darling GL-1 which i haven't got the time to play yet.
Last night, was surreal too! I know my birthday is so last two days, but I'm celebrating it all week, just because I can! (and to make up for previous bad birthdays). Liyana Fizi thinks I'm a pretty girl (ehe vain! ehehe) AND my favorite FAVORITE songbird, Zee Avi thinks my name is lovely and she likes my ipod case. Nyehehehs. Safe to say, I'm smitten =) They both, and my awesome friend (and a new friend I made last night) made my night. You don't know how much. Thanks guys!
I met Zee in 2008 when she was the Kokokaina, and was telling her how i love her music and would love to have her album. She humbly responded with "Takdelah, mana ada album, main suka suka je ni, would you buy one if I have one?", then obviously I said yes! :) We took a picture together and the picture was somehow... lost. :(, SO it was so nice seeing her at the launch! And telling her how i love her Ghostbird. (YOU SHOULD GET IT BECAUSE IT IS SO DREAMY). She's one humble person. Tak forget her root pun, easily my favorite person. Zee, stay you okay?
Gonna take one at a time to day and plan my day. And off to see my fav. girl tonight. Weehoo =D
Dear self,
I love you for getting your way around to get me the GL-1.
Love you lots!

September 8, 2011

Tadi dapat call urgent from boss no 3, yang takde orang dekat kedai. So dia suruh aku datang la ni jugak (and I was half a sleep at that time, super penat from semlam, idk why man :(), patutnya today aku masuk petang. Haihs, the downs (or kadang kadang perks) of working on shift.
Tadi mimpi I, buat rambut style undercut, but thing is, he shaved half his head bald. Gila. Burok nak mati, I, tolong jangan buat. I know this is random, but yeah TOLONG JANGAN.
Dah 8 Sept. 8 Sept. Hehehehe, 2 hari lagi akan pegang GL-1! Yes! (err inshaAllah, takut tak dapat pulak, dont wanna jinx it but I'm super excited!)
Gotta go to work byes!

September 5, 2011


I'm in love. Hari hari rasa best even kalau ada masa down gila, I'll find the good thing in that. My Allah is The bestestestestest. ♥

Kena halau cara halus. Best gila.

Kuat kuat kuat kuat! Alah sikit je kot. Calar sikit je. Takpe takpe, harini hari dia, esok esok hari kita pulak. C'mon D, dah halfway, sikit lagi nak ke garisan penamat. Things will look brighter, inshAllah. All you have to do is be patient. Sabar D, sabar! Nangis banyak mana, keluar air mata darah pun, takkan change a thing. Ni ujian ni, ujian tahap final year yang susah gila. InshaAllah score. Come on! Sikiiiiiit je lagi. Peduli la apa dia nak kata, apa orang nak buat. They don't know you, they don't know what you are going through. Diorang tau surface je. And they will never understand sebab, dorang tu... orang.

Tsk tsk tsk. Nasib baik S ada lagi kat sini.

Kuat D, kuat! You can do ittttttt!
On a lighter note, semalam si cantik Sofea (kot ejaannya?) yang baru darjah 3 dok belek belek ipod aku. Aku pulak time tu tengah buka FB sebab nak buat apatah tak ingat plak. Sekali si cantik tanya aku "Kakak, kakak ada facebook?".
Aku pun, mengiyakan, dah terang lagi bersuluh kan soalan tu. Tapi takpe, budak budak, aku layan "Ha'ah ada... :)"

Lepastu, dia cakap camni
"Hah! Sofea pun ada! Meh la add kita!"

Erm, err. errr.
Adik dia, Sarah (4 tahun), tengah main Blackberry. Fuh, canggih betul budak budak sekarang.

September 2, 2011

Yay yay yay