I want to cover loads and loads of songs. Sad songs, so I can weep. I want the girl beside me to stop listening to her music so loud it could damage my earphones (that I lent her).
I want to eat mud pie without feeling any guilt what damage it'll do to my body. I want to go home. Home as in home with a family in it and not the current house I'm living. I want to be with my brothers. I want us to be toegther again, like a family. I want to have a huge argument with them so that at the end of the day we'll seek each other aplogies and be glad that we have each other. I want to hug my mom. I dont want to fall sick. I'm feeling sickly again and I'm tired of my body telling me that I need to let my breakfast+lunch+dinner out. It has been 3 days, and I'm tired. I'm tired of holding on. I want to burst into tears and have the world's ignorance. I want to help 'em people in Libya. I want world peace. I want you to stop bitching about your dysfunctional family because if you take that huge step to get to know your mom better, you'll see that she's a godsent. She has always been one to us. Stop being a fucking spoilt brat.I want you to be tough.I want them to start doing their work and stop procrastinating. DONT WATCH MOVIES YOU FUCKING TWAT. YOU STILL HAVE WORK TO DO. I WONT DO YOUR WORK THIS TIME NU-UH.I want to cry and I need a hug.
February 4, 2011
Is this all how its gonna be? I mop around and wait, and you come and left whenever you want to and I have my heart on my sleeves all the time but you protect yours.
Do you see me at all?
or you just need a company?
Because, to tell you the truth, I want someone who want to wait for me too and not afraid to show it. Who finds way to ask me to stay. I'm.. it's lonely asking myself to stay in this, just to wait for things I'm not sure are there to begin with. I guess I have faith in you. And it's running low.
:( Ya Allah.