October 29, 2010

A letter to you.

Okay I've been keeping in touch with my past (indirectly) lately, and tonight I went all out. If I can write a letter to my younger self circa 2004-2006, this would be it.

Dear D,
I am from the future, do not freak out as you won't be able to read this until today anyways. I feel like I need to let you know how I feel about you (myself) looking back on things. First of all, you need to know this: your life was fucked up. Crazy shit. I am thankful now that I am normal. More normal than I/you ever were. Alhamdulillah.

I guess, at one point of our lives, people act weird. I mean, weird weird. I mean, what the hell, I/you got rejected but wanted by the same person at the same time. That was twisted. And, few shit happens, which, darling D, i pity you a whole lot. Hm.

One thing I admire most about you is how well you were with people. Where the hell the old me/you go? Gosh, I miss feeling like that. I/you can just talk to strangers from hours to end minus the awkwardness, can I just tell you that you are awesome? (Y). I suck at meeting new people now, I guess when I was you, I tried to find a littlest bit to love in everybody. Now I'm too cynical I guess. Thing is D, you've changed A LOT. Thanks to all those people too. Remember there this one person telling you that you blame everything on people except you? Well, I guess yeah I take that part in and thanks, I don't anymore. :)

I was taken aback when I came to a point where someone gave you his number. I mean, what was that all about? Talk about mixed signals please! Lol, life just been a bit mundane since you left, 2004 - 2006 werent my best years.

You were, enthusiastic... about everything, which I find very good. I lack in that department now. Who the hell care what language I learn anyways? You. Ah, where does the good go, eh? There's a part of you that I miss, really. But I pick up new things along the way thanks to you.

Oh! OH! How can I forget all about me/you being buddy buddy with fav girl and N? OMG girl you surprise me with your guts. If I were you now I won't do such things and fav girl wouldn't know that I exist. Thank you for letting your guts hanging like that. Not classy per se, but helpful in a way. LOL! Though N has forgotten all about me now, but that's okay. :)

What I'm trying to say is, you were so in the dump as you pictured it, but it wasn't all that bad. You got few things that I lack now. And I think, this too, whatever phase I am, shall pass.

Yours truly,
Gambar hiasan: Hai D circa 2004 - 2006, I am you now.


Putri Ramlan said...

nicely written. and well self-awareness to ur self.

D.A. said...

thank you Kakak! :)