Ugh.

It just came to me that, I'll be doing my 8-month internship on January 2011, and I knowwww there are at least 6 months left to go and live with whatever I'm doing right now, but I have to decide on which company I wish to do my internship at. I've done once, when I was taking my diploma and to be quite honest, I didn't feel this restless.

I am not one of the best students here, I am not in the DL, I am nobody here. Which scares me cause I have *might* actually decided on this particular big company, but I chickened out. My pointer just screams average and that is all. I'm actually quite amazed on the fact that *I*'ve gotten in this place on my own. That, I actually went through college and graduated with 4.0 but barely make it 3.5 here. I'm scared shitless!

The ONLY way I can think of right now is get myself a 3.74 pointer for this semester and I know I'm taking only 15 credit hour but the syllabuses aren't something you can kid around. They. are. maderfaker. hard. -______________-"
I hope whatever I'm doing right now, with every notes, every short-hands, every attendance and time I spent on the subjects are worth it. Pls pls pls pls, I need to be in that company! NEED.

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And, registration for the new semester has just opened today. I guess I'll be taking minor subjects and the hell I do not know which to choose! I've been to one of the minor class under corporate management (My program has the option to choose between Corporate Management or Financial Management jsyk), and it was really an eye-opener as to how little I know about business, and the worse part is, I cannot see I'm acing that class.

But I wanted to take up corp mgmt, and not financial related just cause I think I can do it better than the other. But yeah, dude I don't know cause I've been to one of the classes and I don't think I can, so I really don't know. I know I'm being such a whiny bitch right now but I seriously feel unsettled and need to get this out of my chest.

Clock is ticking fast and so many big decisions need to be made at the end of June. What. Why.

Ugh. Growing up IS hard.

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Everyone seems like a responsible young adult now, travelling back and forth visiting their parents, and getting hitched here and there. They are making me feel like I'm stuck in my highschool years. Tsk.